Saturday, January 8, 2011

Anxiety & I.

I am a very anxious person. I'm suffering from depression and anxiety. People just think I'm over-dramatic most of the time and I admit it I can be, but I just panic when pain is around. I am in pain every single day. I go to sleep in pain and wake up in pain. I feel like something is trying to kill me. Everyday I feel like it's the end, I'm kicking the bucket. This is another reason I'm so withdrawn from a lot of things and people. I'm worried all the time. When I'm all the train I'm worried about passing out and ruining other people's day. Sounds crazy I know but I don't want to be a burden on anyone. I don't want to make people suffer and I don't want people sulking all over my Facebook wall. I'm suffering from a disease that's doing away at me. Besides I'm cynical I don't believe most people just pretend to care. Just today proves it. I wake up and see a missed call so I call back.

Me; Hello
Person: Hello
Person: Are You Alright
Me: I'm fine
Person: But are you ok I heard this blahblah
Me: I'm fine
Person: oh alright. Listen Can I claim you on my income tax?

See people don't really care as they make themselves 'appear' or 'sound'. New Year, same problems. Ollie just face it you are deliriously metal. You need to be evaluated. Doctors think your totally a nut job and that your always on some sort of a drug. It's never drugs. Obviously nothing is actually real it's all just symptoms of schizophrenia. Yes we have a name for it. We'll prescribe you some purple & pink pills and you shall be normal again. Wouldn't you want to fit in? Stop all this non sense. It's all just pathetic excuses on why you can't cope with reality. We all suffering Ollie. You are not the only one. Man up and stop crying like a little baby. Truth hurts doesn't it? ButButBut I'm still alive? It's all still real, right?

No comments: